The following list indicates behaviors that may lead to physical abuse/domestic violence in a relationship:
History of family violence
Use of violence to resolve problems, quick temper
Jealousy with other relationships/friendships
Expectation that you should follow orders/advice
The following list contains signs of domestic violence:
Name calling/put downs
Isolation from family and friends
Actual or threatened physical harm
The violence takes many forms and can happen all the time or once in a while. Examples of domestic violence are:
• physical assault or abuse — hitting, pushing, shoving, slapping, choking, punching, kicking, grabbing, beating, throwing her down, tripping, twisting arms, biting, using a weapon
• threatened physical harm
• sexual assault or abuse — unwanted, forced sexual activity, making her do sexual things against her will, physically attacking the sexual parts of her body, etc.
• emotional abuse — mind games, name-calling, put-downs, making the victim feel bad about herself
• jealousy — a sign of possessiveness and lack of trust
• controlling behavior and forced isolation (from family or friends) — controlling what the victim does, who the victim sees or talks to, where the victim goes, relocating to a remote area, etc.
• economic abuse — preventing the victim from getting or holding a job, and controlling the purse-strings by withholding money, taking her earned money, giving her an allowance, making her ask for money, etc.
HOW TO LEAVE:
• Realize that you need help & your worth being safe.
• Contact a friend, family member, or support system for assistance.
• Remove yourself from the abusive situation as soon as possible.
• Develop a safety plan & share that plan with your friend or support systems.
• Memorize important numbers.
• Establish “code” words with your support system so they can know when to call for help.
• Take important papers (birth certificates, social security cards, marriage or divorce papers, driver’s license, etc.) to obtain benefits or take legal action.
* Call 911. If needed, obtain an order of protection with or without filing a police report.
* Women In Need of Godly Services Emergency Shelter: Contact Women In Need of Godly Services. If you are a victim of domestic violence and in need of dire help, we have a trained counselor who can go over a series of questions to ensure our facility is the best option.
* Counseling: We can lead you to available resources for yourself & your children.
If you are in an abusive relationship, the most important thing to do is get out of the relationship. Doing so can save your life and the lives of your children. Nobody deserves to be abused in a relationship, and there are infrastructures put in place to help you leave an abusive situation.